SilverDream

Christmas has brought me something to entertain me, and help me with the keeping fit thing. DDR. I'm getting better at it, it's actually getting fucking intense. Excuse my language. I am so sweaty right now and I'm so stoked. Yeah this is sweet. Also, on a side note, I love Selena.

holidayyys

This is really turning into a place where I can better myself by talking about the things that bother me.. about me. My body is the main factor, but christmas is a shitty time to try to lose weight. My goal right now mainly I think is to not GAIN. I think my New Years resolution will be to loose weight, and I know that it will be much easier to actually lose after new years. I'm already practicing asanas so I can join yoga.. AND I plan on going back to my original tanning place, I loved it there so much. Yikes. I also wish my hair would grow faster! JEES.

honestly.

Last night I discovered another really good reason to get into shape and get fit. I enjoying being on top but get way too tired way too fast! Hahaha. Yep, good reasons. 

galang!

I've been really fascinated with the idea of hot/bikram yoga  in the last while. This is to the extent where I have been looking up the 26 asanas and have decided to practice them so that if I decide to join I wont look really goofy and like a no0b. It's supposed to be know as 'Bikram's torture chamber' because it's intense yoga poses in room heated to 105 degrees. The heat helps you release toxins and makes it easier for you to stretch. Being that you are in this hot room for 90 minutes doing a very  physical work out, you POUR sweat off of you. Anyways, I'm just looking forward to joining eventually. I went through the 26 asanas this morning and I know I need to practice them a bit first. 

On another note, I've done some form or work out or excercise.. even if it is minimal everyday for a while now. Yoga yesterday, yoga today and also a bit of a fitness routine. I'm feeling good, nothing noticeable yet, but decent enough. Also, I went grocery shopping a couple days ago and picked up veggies, evoo and soba.. so I've been eating really decently as well. Yes! Christmas ain't got nothing on me!

how passionate.

Seems to me that I have caught a bit of a virus. Also, sore from working out. Took two hours out of my 12 hours of working today so I have time to go home before the staff meeting. I plan to do at least a partial workout. I started to do one last night as well but then had to go out. Generally, the eating is going fine.  Jen and I are watching Rachel Ray right now. I have to admit, she makes some weird thing.. but they are generally pretty healthy(minus all the EVOO!) 

Yeah, stuff. I'm stoked on this. This and passion!

Also, I'm looking into starting Hot Yoga. Basically... yoga.. in a 90-100 degree room of infrared heat. Excellent.

.5,woo.

So another day. Today I haven't given into the temptations of the DOUBLE chocolate cookies that fill Jen's cookie jar. To top that, I also bought two weights to accompany my workout efforts. Thing's will happen, in fact things are already happening. Slowly but surely. First 5 pounds are always the hardest apparently. 

I'll do a work out no matter what tonight. If I go out anywhere, I'll workout and shower first. I want a little tummy and small arms. I want healthy foods!

gingerbread man ain't got nothin'

Things are going okay. I have been pretty decent with my food. Cookies are far too tempting though. Anyways, I'm still really trying for this. Not much alcohol, not much fatty foods, some yoga and health foods. Decent way to go. Just.. lengthy. I'm going to be working a lot this week so hopefully I can still find time to work out a bit and make healthy meals. This past weekend made me want it even more, I'm so ready for this. Just take control, now.

**Edit**

I just did a nice workout and I feel awesome. That's about it. Now.. Play by David Banner is playing. Hahaha. I am so thrilled.

LEOPARD, RAWR

I weighed my self. 2 pounds down I think, around there. now, 4 more to go until my first goal. should be fine. I'm doing decently with the healthy food and staying away from most fatty foods. Had a fruit bar for breakfast, will behaving potstickers for dinner! SO good. Chicken/veggies/soy soy sauce in a dumpling! Excellent.

Today I knew that I would be paying much attention to how I look so I treated myself to a black shirt and sweeeeeeeeeeeeet leopard bandana thing. Hopefully that, my high heels and my hair will make the night decent. I feel good today. Days where I feel good make it so much easier to push myself. Yes.

generation.

This is definitely one area where I really don't want input unless I ask for it. I haven't received any, I'm just saying. Maybe because I feel obsessive about it, maybe because I feel unhappy about it and maybe because I'm struggling with finding the knowledge to make this possible for myself and keep my life simple. Here I am.. sitting here.. watching some show on MTV about people with eating problems and weight gain issues and not being able to get it off or keep it off. Don't worry, I know this isn't me.. I just see their good end results and wonder why I can't reach my own end results and why I lack the motivation even though I want it SO badly. More than ANYTHING. I just don't get it. Yoga tonight. I need this. Why is it so hard.

fat house cat

It is December 4th and really nothing changes... I'm so frustrated and I know it's just my lack of effort. Yesterday I got my hair done, today starts the CRAZY efforts and everything that goes with it. I've been laying off the alcohol already. Last weekend I went dancing and drank then, which I think from this point on until Christmas would be the only justifiable time to drink. Drink, then dance the calories off. Also, I'm really stoked on fruit right now. Raspberries, mandarin oranges.. and such. I think I'm going to try and keep processed foods away from my body for the time being. Christmas is horrible for me when it comes to eating sweets and weight gain. SO THIS IS IT, I would prefer coming out of December looking and feeling better than when I went in. Maybe I'll see that doctor my mom want's me to see as well. That might help a lot.. 

Also. I WILL work out today when I get home. I WILL. There are no excuses. None. Come on.